Anal sex is becoming less of a taboo, but it can be a daunting idea and consent is essential. Once a taboo, anal sex is now seen as an enjoyable addition to many sexual relationships. So now your partner wants to give it a try.
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The idea that anal sex always hurts is a common myth, not unlike the idea that vaginal intercourse always hurts the first time. Neither of these is true. Doing it right also means paying attention to your body and knowing how to respond when you notice a change in how sexual stimulation is feeling. It isn't because there is something inherent to anal sex that means it has to hurt. They are muscles, though, and as long as they are properly stretched, there is no harm in exercising them. Safe and pleasurable anal sex requires you to be able to relax these muscles, not simply learn to tolerate the pain of them being stretched. If your technique is to grin and bear it, you aren't having safe or pleasurable anal sex. Another aspect of anal sex that may cause discomfort is the feeling of fullness or pressure in the anal canal and rectum. Some people, though, find that once they get comfortable with the sensation, there is pleasure behind the novelty. It is possible to have anal sex without ever experiencing pain, but it does take some extra work.
Do you like getting jackhammered till your hole is raw? We heard you loud and clear: Our community survey got hot and heavy last month with a variety of responses to our questions about pain and anal sex. First, a few words about the survey. We shared this question anonymous survey with our social media followers, on our website and in our newsletters—to reach a convenience sample of people connected to San Francisco AIDS Foundation. The people who took the survey likely felt they had something to say about pain and sex. A total of people took the survey. Cis-women, trans men, trans women, genderqueer people, gender non-conforming, gender non-binary and genderfluid people also took the survey. This is where it gets juicy: More than of you wrote in to explain what you like, and why!
As more couples explore this type of sex, understanding the risks, rewards, and proper strategy is important. According to the Centers for Disease Control CDC , anal sex is primarily growing in popularity with couples under age You might think of anal sex as anal penetration with a penis, but you have a few more options. Anal sex can also be performed with fingers or the tongue. Sex toys , like vibrators , dildos , and butt plugs , are used too. It just requires more planning, prep, and communication than some other forms of sexual activity. Safety during sex should be a top priority, but having fun is certainly important, too. Keep reading to learn more.